The “M” Word


This post was written for The Christian Home – Issue 9 – an online Christian magazine.
Stop by and read all the articles submitted…you will feel encouraged refreshed afterward!

The “M” word = Modesty.  WOW!  Two “sensitive subjects” in two weeks.  (Last week was Submission, if you’re feeling up to it you can view that post HERE.)  Whew!  Hope y’all will still “love me” after this! {smiles}

Modesty is something that is very important to me – because it is important to the guys in my life.  But honestly, it is more than that because I am a woman and I realize the importance of this as related to my relationship with ChristModesty is more than just what we wear.  Why / how?  Well, simply, because it affects others.  Therefore the responsibility lies with us and what we will do with that.  I understand the desire to be appreciated for the way we look and the excitement of being coo’d over, but we can’t just look at that – we have to look at the whole picture.  And that picture includes those who are looking.

There is a H.U.G.E. difference between men and women in this area.  Men are VISUAL and women are emotional.  What does this mean?  Men are VERY SENSITIVE to what they see and images can stay with them for years, if not for life.  Sounds wonderful when you’re young, right?  Well, what about when you are married and those images are coming back to your husband – not so exciting or wonderful then, huh?  So my point – we need to look beyond how it makes us feel now/today and be considerate of our brothers (and their future wives) and dress in a way that doesn’t make them stumble.  As a matter of fact, there is a Bible verse that talks about this: “But whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in Me to stumble, it would be better for him if a millstone were hung around his neck, and he were thrown into the sea.”  Mark 9:42 – oh! and this one too: “But when you thus sin against the brethren, and wound their weak conscience, you sin against Christ.” 1 Corinthians 8:12

As girls/women, we get “instant satisfaction” by being looked at by boys/men – but again we need to think of others before ourselves…oh, another Bible verse!  Woot!  “Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself. 4 Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others.” Philippians 2:3-4

Okay, now let’s look at WHAT we wear and how it is seen…modest, or not?  Low cut shirts, high cut shorts, tight clothes, clothes with words on the chest or bottom, etc. ~ these are all stumbling blocks for guys and it takes a great deal of strength for them to not look (therefore lust) – often times this strength doesn’t come until a bit later in life when the hormones have settle a little.  The problem…they’ve then looked, and lusted, and those images will be with them for a very long time. I believe this is why dresses and skirts are often seen as modest – because normally they are not form fitting and everything is covered.  There was a survey done by some popular guys (I forget who now) but one of the responses that really surprised me was that even women’s calves can be a stumbling block to guys.  Definately not something I would have considered!  But yet again, I’m not thinking the way a guy does.

Is it hard to find modest clothes – YEP!  Is it worth it to do so?  YEP!  Is being a Christian easy?  NOPE!  Is it worth it to do so – YEP!  Now does this mean you have to be dressed from head to toe?  Or that you can’t wear anything fun or pretty?  Absolutely NOT!

Honestly, I believe it comes down to the heart – a heart for Christ and for our brothers (saved or not, because if they aren’t I pray some day they will be).

[Oh, and another thing…age doesn’t matter – whether a preteen or a grandpa…all men struggle.]

One last important point, geared toward mothers – please keep in mind that your little girls will grow up to be comfortable in whatever they have been wearing their entire lives. So if they’ve been wearing spaghetti straps as a little girl, they are going to be comfortable in those as a teenager.  Just something I thought worth mentioning…

In closing, I truly believe that a lot of girls / women do not know what I’ve shared, or at least they do not understand the depth of what their clothing does to boys / men.  IT IS A VERY SERIOUS THING for them!  And needs to be treated as such by us ladies.  My prayer is that this will help you to understand the importance of modesty – for everyone.  And that it helped you to understand WHY modesty is so important.

It was rather interesting to me…THIS was shared on facebook tonight, goes right along with what I’ve been talking about.  Take a few minutes to listen to it…it is really good!

If you couldn’t tell, this is actually a “soap box” item of mine because I feel so passionately for the boys / men in my life – therefore for all men.  Please help me help them by considering their well-being and SPIRITUAL state when deciding what to wear.

Have a wonderfully blessed day!


2 thoughts on “The “M” Word

  1. Andrea - Moody Mama Says April 2, 2011 at 11:16 pm Reply

    I wish more women understood how their lack of modesty makes them appear to men. I know that I personally don’t want to be looked upon as a piece of meat and I can’t figure out why anyone would want to!

    Thank you for stopping by my blog 🙂


  2. Terri G. April 4, 2011 at 4:46 am Reply

    Hey Dawn: You put this in such a sweet way. If I tried to blog about it, I may not come across loving. I agree with you about this, no feathers ruffled in my camp. I have four sons and my hubs, this is something that is a constant irritation. Now that spring is here, it will be more common.
    ~Terri G., who didn’t own a modest article of clothing until she met Christ.


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